Flu is Better-My Attitude Sucks

Hmm Is there such a thing as Post-fludom depression?

Weight Worries: I think I have it. No weight loss in the distance past (back up to 200 today)-arghghg. I am calling to see if the doctor has had a cancellation on Monday and maybe get back on my bike tomorrow???

poor me...I think I need something sweet :)..ahh how the habits die hard. I was a hound for sweet today. I finally had a see's butterscotch sucker (50 calories) and a bowl of sugar coated rice puffs with milk at 11pm. Thank goodness my husband was not buying into my ..whiny make me something desserty attitude. Damn him :)

#$@%$$ Flu

I'm still sick. I got up to see Grace and David off for the day and landed myself back on the couch to look at my email. 5 hours later I woke up and my older daughters came in and gave me heck about napping on the couch with a snuggy. I now have a horrendous back ache from sleeping on lumpy couch pillows.

I am now ready for bed again at it is 830 pm. I haven't been this sick in years.

Sick and Employed

I woke up with what I hoped was allergies on Wednesday. The hotel I stayed at was swanky but they had a little mold problem in the main hallway. It rained the night I arrived. The hotel buildings were arranged in a semi-circle and connected with one long hallways. I was in building 4. Every day when i walked to my building there was a strong smell of mold was pretty potent at the end of my hallway. I occasionally have allergy problems and thought (OK i was hoping) that my sore throat and snotty nose plus a really dry mouth was the result of that mold.

Nope-it is some bug I picked up. Today I had a mild fever and felt like crap. I mustered up gumption to do all the things I needed to do adding in an hour nap in the middle.

Good stuff:

I went to a job interview for a part time teaching job at the local community college. I got it and will teach an algebra class part online and part face to face this spring.

I tutored a paying customer this afternoon.

I am on a weight down swing slowly creeping down towards 198.

I am not hungry at all. I am assuming it is the illness.

Not so good:

Grace had a friend home from school and because all three of the girls are the same age they all did math together and I didn't feel like I could charge the girls mom (she is my friend) for tutoring.

I did not have much enthusiasm for the whole thing as I was sick. At one point I saw sparkles of light (Not sure what the deal was there but it finally went away after I got a drink of water).

I don't think I will be able to quit my job just yet as one class and one tutoring student doesn't compensate for full time employment.

I have a feeling Spring term is going to be one hell of a ride.

Another couple of grand days-

On Monday I went to a few sessions. Met more awesome 'peeps' and had some great conversations about math, grants and evaluations. All good fun and really got my brain working.

Several of us instituted the before dinner beach walkers club and as a result I made a whole bunch of friends and collected lots of shells and sea glass to take home. We walked up and down the beach for an hour each of these days then popped back into our rooms for a quick clothing change and then back out to the hotel lobby to catch the bus for dinner each night.

On Monday we took the bus into San Diego and the gas lamp district. We went to a swanky restaurant that had a tower of wine and a wine fairy who went up on a harness to harvest bottles from the tower. I stuck to the appetizer list and had a crab cake and a vodka and orange juice. Thank goodness everyone takes a long time over their dinner so it did not draw too much attention when I lingered over my food and didn't eat much.

After dinner we walked past several bars including the croche bar. It used to be owned by Jim Croche the singer and apparently currently owned by his wife. There were album cover pictures all over the place and lovely jazz coming out through the doors. We made a stop at Gheradellis (no clue how to spell that) for a rocky road ice cream cone while we waited for our bus to pick us up.

Lunch on Monday was a bit of a challenge-i wanted oatmeal (something smallish with a bit of protein) but they were all out. My choice without oatmeal was chicken noodle soup or a club sandwich. I don't really like chicken noodle so went for the sandwich but of course there was no half choice and ended up eating 1/4 of the beast and carried the rest back to my room. They gave me a big old bowl of fruit with it and a pickle. In the end i tossed the rest of the sandwich and about half the fruit after a night and day in the mini bar.

It is annoying that some places flat out provide no smaller meal options. I guess I need to be more forward about asking for less even if I end up paying for it all. It is after all such a waste to put so much into the garbage every time.

Today I had to be up at 7am to make it down to the sessions for breakfast and opening instructions for presenters. I had a cup of O.J., a 1/4 cup of eggs and 1/2 a scone over the course of the morning. Attended a few sessions, had a couple of cans of Diet Coke over ice. The conference provided lunch buffet style. I used to be really sad about all of the stuff I couldn't have...at some point (and don't ask me when or how) I have discovered the bread basket no longer holds an allure. I took 3 tortellini pieces, 1/4 of a chicken Parmesan, 2 cucumber slices, 2 cooked zucchini slices and later a lovely 2x2 inch piece of lemon cheese cake. There was a session about online games and learning (I will put the websites up after I have checked them out)and then at 3pm had to do my own presentation.

When my session was over we raced down to our rooms and changed for our beach walk. Today I found some really cool shells, three big pieces of beach glass and two chunks of the biggest clams you can imagine! I really thought they were broken pots at first. I showed it to one of the other walkers who is also a science prof and she and the others decided they were shells. They are amazing. I am going to take them home to use with my tutor students. A little geometry is in order to figure out how big they were before they were broken.

After our beach walk we changed and got on the bus for downtown Coronado. The group decided on an Italian restaurant. They had a Caprese salad with Parma ham as an appetizer option and of course my pre-dinner vodka and orange. For some reason this place had HUGE portions. I ended up with three large tomato sized servings. a thick slice of tomato, a 1/4 inch slice of buffalo mozzarella, a basil leaf and thin slice of the ham. I managed to eat almost one of them and then was done. A little later after a walk we all went in for about 1/2 of lowfat frozen yogurt. I again carried my leftovers home but I opened it a while ago to nibble on a bit more of the cheese...it wasn't very good so I have tossed it also.

Tomorrow I will go to sessions in the morning and then off to the airport for the ride home. I think everyone has missed me. I have had several calls from all of my daughters about one thing or another--including a fender bender, Grace missing me and the others wanting information about the fender bender their sister had....As bothersome as it can be sometimes it does make a mother feel needed :)

San Diego ;) I Like it!

I was not the happiest or very excited to go to San Diego but I am here now and as always It is awesome! I am in a swanky hotel (http://www.loewshotels.com/en/Hotels/San-Diego-Resort/Overview.aspx). The weather is not warm and toasty as I had hoped but it is nice. I ran into a couple of people i know at the airport who were also headed here :) hooray...

We rented bikes after we arrived. We rode them about 5 miles into the center of the island, had lunch, and then rode them back again. Along the way we traveled along a bike path with the ocean on one side and the bay on the other. We had lunch at a New York Pizza place where I shared a calzone with one of the people I ran into-i ate the insides out and it went down quite nicely. We had a nice mathy/education conversation over lunch (OK I am flying my nerd flag). and then headed back to the hotel.

Our return trip was through neighborhoods and then back to the bike path. There were several houses for sale that were nice looking (but not huge-say 3 bedroom, 3 bath and 2000 square feet). One had a flier advertising it for 4.6 million!!!!!!!!!!!! Crazy expensive here! We made a stop at the beach and hung out for a few minutes picking shells. The beach bulldozes a hunk of sand into berms along the beach front and in those berms are loads of shells. I picked up a really cool long snail shell and some scallop ones. We then got back on and rode back to the hotel.

Now I am sitting in the lobby in the bar with...FREE INTERNET! At least in the states swanky hotel and fee internet do not go together. I am one happy camper right now. a nice bar, vodka and orange juice and internet...is there anything better than that? ;) OK there probably is but right now..just now in the peace of this bar I am content.

Oh and the thin ability to ride a bike and sit on an airplane with no problems (I even had to tighten the seatbelt!!)...oh can you tell today was a good day? Today was a very good day.

The 'Fill' is Gone

All phantom restriction has left the building. I am down a bit (still in the range around 200 though) and the band has opened its baby bird mouth and is squawking incessantly for me to feed it.

I am doing the hang by my fingernails unsuccessfully today. Damned Girlscout cookies have entered my home and I am not coping as well as I did last year. If i remember correctly I had a good restriction going on at this time last year and could only eat two cookies without really feeling them hit bottom. This year...well lets just say I fought the cookies and I won this time. arghghghg I wish the NP had been successful.

I am off tomorrow for San Diego to speak at a conference. I am not overly excited to go as the weather is not exciting down there (60 and rainy) and I have a ton of stuff I want to do at home to get my business going (business license, bank account, advertising etc)...and I could have had a fill appt. on Monday but noooooooo im in San Diego. phhhhhhht.

I sound whiny..don't get me wrong I love to travel..its just I would rather it be leisure not work right now.

I hope all of your bandy worlds are spinning merrily.

No Fill

I went in for my fill..I came out with a failed fill and restriction again? I know you are saying what???? Yeah me too!!! I do not know if it the whole girly period thing or if she beat my port so much that it shot another bit of saline into my band but holey moley..i have returned to the land of restriction.

Breakfast-1 oz of cheese
Lunch-nope nada because i was going in for a fill and I didn't want any food above the band of restriction.
Snack after the fill-naughty naughty-4 big ball cheetos and a bite of Graces bagel and strawberry cream cheese.
Dinner-attempted to eat 2 oz of leftover roast beef. 2 animal crackers sitting on the counter from Graces afternoon snack.

ok..so then the excitement began. Some of you may remember past incidences of my turning away from the roast beef..well actually all beef. It was just not a happy partner in my band and nutrition goals :)...ok ok..i always get stuck and barf the stuff. Well I had been having a bit of respite from this problem. I have cooked roast beef about every other week for my family. I cook it to death (5 hours at 250 degrees) when it is done it literally falls apart in the pan. Wednesday night I had no problems with the roast. Last night with leftovers (and perhaps it was the fact that it was cold leftovers)...man o man..it got stuck. Pain at my chest level and repeated dashes to the garbage disposal. In the end after 5 barfs and about 30 minutes of excruciating pain I am again (mentally and I think physically) a restricted and changed woman.

You see-I had begun to test the waters again. I imagine this will happen for the rest of my life as those fat demons don't just go away when you have a little success..they stay floating around your head saying..oh come on Tina your not all that restricted..have another bite...oh come on you deserve it..just another cookie...and so on.

So frankly, I am a tad scared to eat this morning at all. I am sipping my Diet Coke. and waiting as long as possible before i try my 1oz slice of cheese. I am headed into work to pick up some papers before I leave for San Diego on Sunday but will drop back on by this evening with an update.

I am planning on a very good girl day!

Fills

I am going in for my long-debated and now long-awaited fill today. As is with any doctors appointment as soon as you make the appointment whatever is wrong seems to right itself. Yesterday and the day before i was quite tight. I am positive it was PMS related bloating that did it and today things are much better.

It is funny how fills work. in the beginning we chase a little restriction. waiting for each feeling that food is getting caught, that we are feeling fuller on any amount of food. I remember saying to myself. Just give me something. Most of my errors or mistakes were from lack of chewing then. Eventually I had to give up bread and many vegetables because they would always get stuck. Finally I learned to chew and of course then needed another fill because the food slipped through when i did my job.

When I reached what I would call real restriction chewing became much less of a problem but it took me forever to figure out what full was. In the beginning I frequently though I was getting stuck when in fact I was just plain old eating too much. Eventually during this period I figure out that pain and frequent runs to my kitchen garbage disposal meant a stuck episode. In contrast to this copious amounts of spit, or the feeling that food was building up in my throat and perhaps a single run to the sink meant that I had over-eaten and I needed to get a grip on listening to my stomach and chest (because i feel it up there) that eating time is done.

Was I done here...oh no. Since my first real restriction I have refined my chewing and food choice and meal size skills.I can eat some of the foods I gave up at the beginning (like small pieces of bread, and roast beef) I have, of course also lost more weight. I would say about 55 pounds of it was after i reached various iterations of restriction. I really do not believe there is a sweet spot as so many talk about...it is more of a sweet spot for now.

Anyway this refining thing. I look at it like exercise. There is a point when if you do the same exercise over and over that you learn efficiency and end up burning less calories than you previously did doing the same thing. I think with our band two things happen. We lose a bit of weight and the band loosens a little bit. We learn what to eat, when to eat it and how to get things down more easily because we are efficiency driven humans after all!! This combination of losing a little and efficiency means that at some point the fill we have comes to a slow halt. I gain and lose the same three pounds over and over (going from loose to tight and back and forth until my brain finally registers (usually at least a month) that it is time to go in and fill some more.

So we have come to today-approximately 8 fills from the beginning of things almost exactly 1.5 years from my band installation. I am going in for fills that are between .2 and .5 cc's now. The surgeon always says that these are approximate because the syringe and the pulling out of fluid are fickle and not finely calibrated. I am sitting right around 200 pounds. This is in the middle of my up and down cycle from 198 to 203. I hope this one allows me to get some distance away from 200 and perhaps into the 180's. I also hope that I have a few more fills in me. I really think part of this is the kick up the backside the change of a fill brings as much as it is restriction itself.

At some point I am really afraid that my efficiency will kick in before the band room does and I will not have room for a fill but can eat more than my metabolism will burn. There has to be some end to the physical capacity of this band I think. Will that capacity be used up at goal? or will it happen before then? I have 30 pounds until I reach my original goal weight and what I weighted in high school. I have 45-50 pounds to reach the BMI goal weight for myself. At some point I have shifted my goal to that BMI goal and away from the high school weight. I think I can do it. I do know the band has given me the confidence that I can. There is however a little voice of fear in the back of my head that my behavior vs fill space equation will balance and behavior will rule. I hope I get to the end of the trail before that happens!

The Silent Semi-Anonymous Followers

My followers list grew a bit today and as I have seen commented on a couple of blogs-many of you do not have a blog posted that I can link to. I would love to know more about you. When I get a new follower I always try to find a blog to at least check out :)...and probably follow too (although I often do this in fits and spurts).

If you do have a blog leave a comment and address so I can come over for a visit! I promise to leave a comment back. If you have a blog listed and I didn't find it yet-rest assured I will be visiting and commenting soon!

If you do not have a blog I would very much appreciate it if you would drop me an email or post a little comment to this post telling me a little more about yourself and perhaps what brought you to my bloggy little home.

I noticed i got my first non-spouse guy follower..woohoooo. I was never this popular when i was hanging out in bars in my youth :)..come on talk to me!

Turned My Frown Upside Down-Thanks Linda

Today has been a trying day. You know those kind of days when your hormones are off and almost everything has a gray mist of negativity to it ( a vision problem I am sure)..well then compound this bad attitude with a few very negative events (mostly work related) that deepens the funk. So following this confluence of negativity I avoided all work related concerns by surfing around the blogs looking for a little distraction.

tripping around here and there I happened upon a bright shining beacon of sunshine. Linda over at Linda's Bandwidth presented me with a Beautiful Blog Award. Thank you Linda! You have brightened my day considerably. I like reading your blog too! You are much better at getting pics up than I am and I have loved following your ups and downs thus far. Here is for more downs than ups in the weight department anyway.



Here are my instructions:
• Thank the person who nominated you for this award
• Copy the award and post it in your blog
• Link to the blog of the person who nominated you
• Tell seven interesting things about yourself
• Nominate seven bloggers
• Post links to the blogs of your nominees

The facts:
1. I am quitting my job in either May or August.
2.I am starting a math tutoring business (if anyone wants to try online tutoring I am game-free trials of course).
3. I started a second blog page to document my New Years Resolutions-i have not been blogging on it!! I am still making progress though.
4. I never wear matching socks. I buy Kb footy socks at Costco and never match them so they belong together but in a wild colorful way.
5. I am a nerd and proud of it. I have trained my children to have pride in their nerdiness as well.
6. I love to travel and am itching to go even now. Next week is a conference in San Diego where I am planning on renting a bike.
7. If you let it happen your band can change much more in your life than the size of your stomach. Mine has opened up a wide world that I never knew I wanted.

Nominated Bloggers: Ok first of all everyone on my followers and followed list deserves this award. The good news is that everyone should get the award eventually because we seem to be a somewhat closed group (all of my friends are friends at my friend's blogs if you can figure out what i mean there!!) Here is my list:

Bunny at the weight-loss expedition. She has been blog-absent of late but she was the first blog I followed and had a huge impact on my decision to get this surgery. I just wish that I lived closer to her so I could drag her out with me for fills, drinks, and bike rides oh and learn how to cook better from her-her food pics always look delicious!!

Caroline at Lonicera's Lapband and other JourneysCaroline's skill with the camera and pen (or in this case keyboard) are awesome! I have thoroughly enjoyed reading both her lapband stories and adventures in South America!

The New Band Girls

These three blogs are the newly banded. It is really cool to read your blogs and think back to the time when I was right where you are. Feel assured that what you go through someone among us (the whole bloggy family) has lived through the experience too. You each remind me both of what to keep my mind on and how far I have come. I am happy you are here and wish you each the best!!

Justine at Adventures in Band LandYou better include something about your chickens in your 7 facts! I covet a chicken coop! They are not allowed in my neighborhood.

Yana at Girl Meets BandI love love New York, the trains, the delis, the offices...everything! You let me see a little bit of that life in your blog.

Colleen at Colls this time i mean itAnother New Yorker to live vicariously through. That great restriction should be coming soon and I want to hear more about it!

Non-Banded Bloggers:

My Aunt Sally (yes she is really my aunt) at chic roses. She doesn't blog often enough but she has a sense of style that is out of this world and is a skilled object painter!


The Bottom of the Ironing Basket All of life cannot be about diet and the reverberating ripples caused by our banded life. Simone provides thought-provoking life challenges (today it is exploring the world), beautiful images and plain old fun!

Birthday Lobster

David and I went out for dinner tonight with friends. My birthday is on Valentines day. That is both a blessing and burden. Birthday dinners have to be planned ahead or they will be full. I get great romantic gifts often but then David is under undo pressure to perform in the romance department.

This year my/our plan was to go out to dinner with friends and try lobster for the first time. As I used to be a picky eater i would just skim by it on the menu proclaiming that I did not eat seafood and go for the chicken or beef. In my new try it attitude I have decided that each time I go out I am going to open my foody horizons a bit more. Obviously since seafood is what I avoided I am now heartily delving into the seafood genre with gusto ;)...

Lobster is good! I really took care to cut small pieces and chew it to death as there are parts that can be quite chewy. My seafood loving friend said that it was a bit tougher than normal. I ate a bit on the back of the tail then my friend pulled out the arms and claw bits. The claw was the best. It was tender and slightly sweet and not fishy at all. the lobster came with melted butter and I dipped a bit but I really could not tell the difference either way so I ate most of it without. They served the meal with asparagus spears (I was sick on these once and do not love them enough to risk it again) and mashed potatoes. I passed on these because i know i tend to get stuck on both and did not want to waste any small stomach room for more lobster and a bite or two of dessert.

The meal was wrapped up with berries and cream. The cream was more like creme fresh instead of whipped cream. I am not sure how they did it here as I have never seen creme fresh for sale in the states. I had two or three bites and meal done.



Next on my list I think is crab legs. I have had imitation but never the real thing. I am taking all suggestions now for favorite foods that are band friendly. I am trying everything at least once.

Protein, Protein, Protein, Protein....

I need to get more protein down. I have been a cheese-eater my whole life. with this next fill approaching I need to really think about how I can get maximum grams for meals. This is a list I lifted from a Obesity Help post a while back. When in doubt i search my files and dig it out. I think it will be better here.

Beef
• Hamburger patty, 4 oz – 28 grams protein
• Steak, 6 oz – 42 grams
• Most cuts of beef – 7 grams of protein per ounce
Chicken
• Chicken breast, 3.5 oz - 30 grams protein
• Chicken thigh – 10 grams (for average size)
• Drumstick – 11 grams
• Wing – 6 grams
• Chicken meat, cooked, 4 oz – 35 grams
Fish
• Most fish fillets or steaks are about 22 grams of protein for 3 ½ oz (100 grams) of cooked fish, or 6 grams per ounce
• Tuna, 6 oz can - 40 grams of protein
Pork
• Pork chop, average - 22 grams protein
• Pork loin or tenderloin, 4 oz – 29 grams
• Ham, 3 oz serving – 19 grams
• Ground pork, 1 oz raw – 5 grams; 3 oz cooked – 22 grams
• Bacon, 1 slice – 3 grams
• Canadian-style bacon (back bacon), slice – 5 – 6 grams
Eggs and Dairy
• Egg, large - 6 grams protein
• Milk, 1 cup - 8 grams
• Cottage cheese, ½ cup - 15 grams
• Yogurt, 1 cup – usually 8-12 grams, check label
• Soft cheeses (Mozzarella, Brie, Camembert) – 6 grams per oz
• Medium cheeses (Cheddar, Swiss) – 7 or 8 grams per oz
• Hard cheeses (Parmesan) – 10 grams per oz
Beans (including soy)
• Tofu, ½ cup 20 grams protein
• Tofu, 1 oz, 2.3 grams
• Soy milk, 1 cup - 6 -10 grams
• Most beans (black, pinto, lentils, etc) about 7-10 grams protein per half cup of cooked beans
• Soy beans, ½ cup cooked – 14 grams protein
• Split peas, ½ cup cooked – 8 grams
Nuts and Seeds
• Peanut butter, 2 Tablespoons - 8 grams protein
• Almonds, ¼ cup – 8 grams
• Peanuts, ¼ cup – 9 grams
• Cashews, ¼ cup – 5 grams
• Pecans, ¼ cup – 2.5 grams
• Sunflower seeds, ¼ cup – 6 grams
• Pumpkin seeds, ¼ cup – 8 grams
• Flax seeds – ¼ cup – 8 grams

Here is a link to a website with even more protein numbers: http://yourtotalhealth.ivillage.com/getting-enough-protein-when-youre-vegetarian.html

I tend to eat from the cheese list. Last night I had eggs!! I have not been able to eat a scrambled egg for more than a year. Se below:

2 oz cheddar cheese-14 grams, 1/4 cup oatmeal with nuts-7 grams, 1 egg-6 grams, butterscotch pudding made with 2% milk-8 That is a total of 35 grams for the whole day. probably not what it should be. I really need to get some meat in there. If it is .4 per pound than I need-80 grams if I weighed 200 (which is where i spend half my week). and if I were to calculate this base don my goal weight-155x.4 is: 62 grams. I got around half what I am supposed to for the day.

Stress and The Band

Can't talk long as I have to leave to go over the pass to do classroom observations. I had a Very emotional and stressful work day yesterday. The band slammed shut, making me realize that I have loosened up big time. It is amazing how much one can delude oneself into thinking one is not eating very much. I have been eating much more than I was with good restriction!

Yesterday it was so tight I ate two meals and had some difficulty with liquids. I finally had some warm coffee and that went down nicely. I need to start drinking decaf hot tea more often I think.

I will go into minute detail later-oh and I got my tattoo. The tattoo hurt as my daughter would say 'like a mother' (not sure why those exact words but they fit here). I is a bit swollen and painful still today.

Ok..have to dash. I hope each of you are having a great day.

Too Much Work Too Little Play-Survey :)

I have been too busy grading papers (20 hours this week) as well as troubleshooting student issues via email and skype.

It is done again for another week and I can take a breath. I have taken the bull by the horns (finally) and applied for a couple of adjunct teaching positions closer to home at a nearby university and am going to draft an advertisement offering math tutoring services and pre-school math sessions in my neighborhood newspaper. Whish me luck!! I really would like to change my job and soon!

Here is the survey going around the blogosphere-I figured why not! I am deleting some of the questions that don't seem to fit a blog setting.

1. What is your occupation right now? Post Doctoral Researcher (really a fancy name for the person who grades two online classes and when I can fit it in-presents atconference presentations and writing research articles.

2. What color are your socks right now? white footy socks

3. What are you listening to right now? America's Funniest Home Videos that my daughter has on the TV

4. What was the last thing you ate? a few bites of the Cornish Pasty my daughter had for a snack after school.

5. Can you drive a stick shift? Yes

6. Last person you spoke to on the phone? My oldest daughter

7. How old are you today? 45 (6 whole days until I am 46)

8. What is your favorite sport to watch on tv? none-I don't like watching sports.

9. What is your favorite drink? Diet Coke and Vodka and Orange juice.

10. Have you ever dyed your hair? Yes to cover the gray.

11. Favorite food? Fish and chips right now..but I change

12. What is the last movie you watched? Hog father (a gruesome Christmas tale via Netflix)

13. Favorite day of the year? Any day when I am going on a vacation.

14. What was your favorite toy as a child? Teddy bear and my bike.

15. What is your favorite season? Summer all the way!
16. Cherries or Blueberries? I like all berries.


17. Living situation? 2400 square foot, 4 bedroom rancher currently for sale :)..anyone interested?.

18. When was the last time you cried? Yesterday-my daughter had stupid Black Beauty on the television and I cried when the poor horse got sold off.

19. What is on the floor of your closet right now. a box with papers in it (very tidy because the house is for sale)

20. Who is the friend you have had the longest that you are sending to? Bunny was the first blogger I followed and had a huge impact on my decision to go with band.

21. What did you do last night? Graded papers!!!

22. What are you most afraid of? the dark-I am slightly night blind and it freaks me out when I cannot see.

23. Plain, cheese, or spicy hamburgers? fish burgers? NO more hamburger for this girl.

24. Favorite dog breed? other peoples dogs? I like being a dog grandma.

25. Favorite day of the week? Friday because of the anticipation of time off. Saturday because i actually have time off.

26. How many states have you lived in? Born in Texas as a baby and toddler I moved with my family to Wyoming and Massachusetts (Dad was in the Air force. We all moved to Washington state when i was 4. I lived there until the ripe old age of 35 moved to Oregon and have been here since.

27. Diamonds or pearls? I'm not a big jewelry wearer-I do wear my diamond wedding and anniversary ring everyday.

28. What is your favorite flower? mums in cut form.

29. What is your favorite color? New grass green

30. What hobbies do you like to do? knit, sew and quilt.

Third Post in a Triple Whammy :) Thursday Shopping!!!!

Thursday..was a fun fun fun day. I went shopping and out to lunch with two friends.

This was my first real clothes shopping trip as a regular sized person. I have tried on the odd thing, did the big jeans torture search a few months ago but this was the first...I am shopping with friends and I do not have to wander over the the plus sized department while they go to the regular sized areas event.

We went to a nearby outlet mall and went to several stores (clothes, shoes, kitchen and Nike stuff). I purchased-2 tank tops and henley style t-shirt from the Gap (size large) and two sweaters from Eddie Bauer in sized extra large (No vanity sizing at Eddie Bauer). I tried on a pair of jeans and a school girl skirt (for a laugh at Gap). The skirt fit me in a size 12!!!! and the jeans a 14 both were not cut right for my waist but it was really cool to button them!

At Liz Claiborne I tried on a very cool wrap dress. It fit very nicely and was $60 but I really do not wear dresses that often and I didn't want to get yet another piece of clothing that I would grow out of before I actually got to wear it anywhere. I will either wait until I have an event or until I get to goal for the wrap dress experience.

We went into a great store I had never heard of before-Cabi. They have been around for a while I guess and started as a home party thing like tupperware. The store was great and I loved the clothes. Very classic looks but with a 40's vibe that was very attractive. I bought a nice black jacket that is longer than normal and with a swing cut. The buttons are lovely on it. When I am at goal I will definitely go back here and set up my wardrobe!


The whole shopping trip and the Cabi store especially made me feel like for the first time that I could dress like I feel. a few years ago I had a student in one of my classes who had a sense style that I admired. At the time it made me sad because when you are wearing plus sized clothes the amount of style..well it is limited isn't it? Things have gotten much better over the years but the fabric is really all you can control because of the effort one must expend on working to camouflage the fat. A wrap dress? no too many stomach rolls. a suit jacket? no made me look like a man. I was really limited to tank tops, open blouses and slacks. At the very least that is how my head dealt with my obesity.

We stopped for lunch near the end of our mall time. The mall had a very nice wine bar the served food. I had a lovely Mueller wine and a cheese plate that I shared with the two women I was with. Again another flag to my existence. I was very selective before about what food I would and would not eat. Thursday I ordered the cheese plate and tried each cheese..I did not eat blue cheese. I do now. I ate a bit of each of the cheeses and enjoyed them.

New bandsters--i urge you. If you were a picky eater. make a vow to try new things and live with the band as an adventurer. our old closed ways did not help us in our happiness. All the foods I 'hated' were just my head closing them out. I think this adventuresome spirit can be applied to everything..exercise, life experience and food. Maybe my word in January should have been ADVENTURE

Wednesday Crazy Grace Day

Wednesday I carried on working on the stuff I did not finish on Tuesday and cleaned up after the Tuesday babysitting day and cook-fest. We have to keep the house ship shape for potential house viewers. I might moan here but I really to LOVE the fact as I have said many, many times before that my house is always tidy.

After school was Grace's horseback riding lessons. My looming work deadline made it so we could not mooch around after school for an hour. Instead I brought her some paper and pens and a snack to eat while we parked in front of the stables. I worked away on my submission while we waited for her teacher to get there. While Grace rode in the muddy dark stable I actually carried in my laptop and papers and kept working on a stool with my laptop on my knee. Thankfully I finished the first draft like this.

After the lesson it was a dash to pick up David from work, a quick spin around the fabric store looking for a friends birthday present (unsuccessfully) and finally back to Grace's school for an evening parent meeting. After the fabric store and before the meeting I had a flashback to my old eating life when we drove through a fast food place for dinner. I managed one piece of fish and 2 french fries from a shared basket of fish and chips (David shared with me). We got home at 9pm.

I decided after we got home that I should have packed our dinner. It would have had to be cold but would not have been that difficult with a little pre-planning. Next time I will see how that strategy works.

Tuesday Cook-Fest

Tuesday I was on babysitting duty for my grandson and he, as he always does, kept me both entertained and busy chasing him with fun and interesting activities to keep him entertained. In the afternoon we went to the grocery store and did our weekly shop. I also had some work come in that needed my immediate attention (ackk..not on babysitting day!). David and I whipped up Shrimp Chile Relleno (a lot of work for the ending product). With the leftovers I made a mock chile relleno with rice by chopping up the chilies, left over cheese (pepper jack and cheddar), shrimp and mixing it with some leftover rice in the fridge. I baked this for 30 minutes and David took it in his lunch. He said it was good.

Next time I decided I am going to try making the chili relleno with canned aneheim chilies (i did it the hard way blistering off fresh chili skins this time). I think I can take these and chop them with the cheeses and shrimp and make a crustless quiche. I think it will taste as good but with way less work.

Since I have brought up the quiche and Jen asked for it a couple weeks ago..here is the recipe.

Quiche Lorraine:

Make pie crust pastry (I used it the first time but I do not think it is necessary and calories could be cut here).

8 slices of bacon
1 cup of shredded cheese
1/2 cup to 1 cup chopped vegetbles (I used some onion and very finely chopped frozen carrots, cauliflower, broccoli, and beets)
4 eggs
2 cups of 2% milk (you can go up or down in fat with the milk. Higher fat milk is creamier, skim can make the quiche a little watery). 2% seems to work great.
1/2 t salt
a few grinds of pepper

if using the pastry roll it out and place it into the pie plate. Sprinkle the cheese, bacon, onion, and vegetables into the bottom of the pie plate. Beat the eggs, milk and spices. Pour the egg mixture over the cheese and vegetables. Put your pie into the oven at 425 degree F. for 15 minutes and then reduce the heat to 300 for about 30 minutes. check to see if the quiche is done by poking it with a knife. if it comes out clean the pie is done.

If you try this tell me what ingredients you use. I will try them out. I think the variations could be endless.

Busy Day But So Sore

Yesterday was my work day. I was sooooo sore from my dirt digging that for breakfast I had an alieve :)...Amazingly that Alieve and Diet Coke filled me up and the pain pill reduced the body aches a little! I got to work and parked about 1/2 mile away from my office. I got on my bike and took a side trip to the nearby carry everything store. I popped in for a plug in cell charger (lost mine) and a bike lock so I could start locking my bike up when I ride it on my jaunts.

I then road a few zigzags through the neighborhood and up the hill to work. I am finally mastering those hills. I cannot believe how quickly your body improves with just a little repeated effort. I rode up to work--carried my bike up the stairs to my office as I had to unharness the bike lock from layers of plastic and anti-theft crap and could not use it yet!!

While at work my dad emailed me that we had finally been approved for tribal membership (after many years my dad, brothers and sisters and I decided to register for the Cherokee tribe). It is a cultural affiliation and pride thing more than for any other reason. When I decided to do this I also decided to commemorate the event with a tattoo. The paperwork has taken over a year to complete so as soon as I was done at work I popped down to the local campus tattoo parlor for a consultation.

I currently have a genies lamp on my right foot to celebrate my Ph.D. (a symbol affiliated with learning). I went and made an appointment for next Wednesday to do some work on my old tattoo and add to the art space :)..I am going to do some adjustment on my lamp (the flame did not turn out like I wanted and color it in Gold). Underneath the lamp I am going to add the phrase everyone is important in the Cherokee written language and then to commemorate the weigh-loss and band I am going to add a turtle in one of the smoke plumes coming out of the lamp...I am quite excited about it all. I was going to wait on the turtle until I hit goal but there is a $100 minimum for foot work so I am just going to do it now (I have after all done the 100 pound thing).

On top of all of this after I came home from work I chilled for 30 minutes (did a little knitting) and then got back out on my bike for another night ride with my neighbor. We added two steep loops to the route and rode a bit further around the grocery store we went to last week. We then rode to the bar and had my vodka and orange (yes I know Yana just like the darned exercise article!!!!).



after the approximately 5 and 1/2 to 6 miles for the day and aching muscles I finally was able to go to bed early :) so was in bed by 10:30. I even talked David into providing me with a little massage :)