Feels Like a Lot of food--Need to See It In Black and White

Yesterday felt like I ate a lot..especially the later, later..after dinner eating. I remember when the agony of what felt like hardly any food first came. I cannot remember exactly when that fill came about but should search back in my blog because i know it is there. Before that I Lost but with what I considered a reasonable amount of food (about 1 and 1/2 cups of food per meal). On that regime the weight loss was good but it eventually stalled. I went in for another fill. That fill finally got me to what I would call a sweet spot.

Before that fill I could usually eat, rest for a bit and feel the food move through my band then eat some more. If I chose ice cream or soup or a smoothie I could eat as much as my lower stomach could hold. At this point I did have to do some work on controlling myself. I had to refuse the ice cream urge. I drank a lot of protein smoothies to make me feel better at that time.

Then I got 'the' fill. I went down to only being able to eat about 1/2 a cup of food (give or take a few tablespoons) per meal. This translated to 1/2 a grilled cheese sandwich minus the end crust. It was hard. There were two meals in particular where I cried. One was home-made macaroni and cheese on Christmas eve and the other was a casserole I made. I had to really settle into my brain that I did not need more. I had my blood-work done and other than the vitamin D deficiency that every Oregonian sports I am healthy and nutrient stable.

I can still eat more ice cream, yogurt and protein shakes but it is uncomfortable and I have to eat the 1/2 and then wait 10-15 minutes or so to eat more (if you don't like melted ice cream and I don't this really isn't doable).

So that brings us to yesterday and today-Over time my brain? desires? not sure what it is has become accustomed to less..in fact yesterday didn't really feel like a small food day. I am eating less when I work on Monday's and Wednesdays but I am now sitting here feeling like I ate a lot today-definitely more than yesterday. Today is a stay at home day and I snacked more..I am gong to list it to compare the two days.

Breakfast-

8:00 am a steel cut oat cookie, 1 small graham cracker square, 1 diet coke (not in that order)

10:00 am another graham cracker square with grandson.

12:00 pm a pickle while I made the tuna
12:15 Lunch-1/4 of a tuna sandwich (I saved the other 1/4for later)

(My grandson ate just over 1/4 of his too and I saved it)

2:00 Snack-the other quarter of my sandwich
3:30 Starbucks peppermint skim mocha
4:00 1/2 a krispy creme doughnut (need to blog about this..soooo nasty!!)

6:30-my grandsons left over tuna sandwich.
7:30-1 cup of chicken and wild rice soup (took me 30 minutes)
10:00 pm-6 oz yogurt.

It is more than yesterday...lots of snacky snacky crap.

so weird-today i would say i need a fill. Yesterday not so much. My weight bounced back up to 296 from yesterday's 294. I have not ridden my bike since Monday. Too cold and rainy in the evenings. Tomorrow I am taking it to Corvallis where I will clean off my old desk and take one last bike ride around town.

Thanks peoples for the blog awards. I will try and get all caught up on the weekend.