Another Day Another Fill

I went in for my second fill today. He said that I had 0.5 more cc's than he found last time (wow I appear to be creating saline in my band ! :) hahaha. The doctor said that the tube must not have released the extra 0.5 cc's during my last visit. The doc added in another 0.5 cc's today so Now I have 4.5 cc's of fluid in my (i believe it is 10cc band). So far I am really hungry and I feel very little difference from yesterday. I only had clear liquids this morning and through dinner time. I had a pasts dish made fresh my garden grown tomatoes for dinner and then snacked my way through the evening on cottage cheese, cheese sticks, a few peanut butter pretzels...

Now i have to say I felt very similar to this right after my last fill then i tightened up for two weeks, lost a little and then was back to feeling no restriction. I am going to make my next fill appointment right away for two weeks from now (that is as soon as he allows)

I am a bit worried that my insurance is going to change and that the new one is not band friendly. I talked it over with my doctor and he suggested that as long as we can get me well restricted by the time the insurance runs out (Jan 1) I should be ok. The biggest concern is that if i have a big problem with my band i might have to foot the bill myself.

I do think this is kind of stupid! If I have an employee sponsored insurance plan and they are not allowed to screen for preexisting condition than any problems the develop over time should be covered---well i am going to fly without a net here. wish me luck!

Breaking Up Is Hard To Do

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tbad22CKlB4.. I can't figure out how to embed a utube video in this post so please link to this website, turn up the sound and play it in the background while you read this post.


Well today was a BIG lesson. A lesson I will not forget soon and one that will have a lasting impact on my behavior.


So I once had a conversation with a friend (yes A.M. this is you!) about my issues with food and why I am the big fatty that I am. I shared with her my addiction to fast food. I am one of those rare people (or at least the rare who will admit to my addiction) who like------gulp----McDonalds. I like the fries. i like the burgers. I like the fact that I can drive in and get my food and eat it as I drive down the road. I like it. Well tonight I learned that it is time to break up with my boyfriend McDonalds (and all of the other bad boys along the freeway within drive up distance of my travels). So here is the sad break up story.

I have been wide-open since Monday (or at least that is what i thought). I could eat to my hearts content from lunch until late into the evening. Breakfast could still be problematic but not overly so. Today i didn't even have a twinge at breakfast so I said to myself as I left work tonight...let's do one last drive up at McDonalds on my way home from work. On Monday I am getting a fill and this might be one of my last chances.

So I did the drove up (Mistake number 1). I ordered a chicken sandwich meal (mistake number 2). I drove out onto the road and proceeded to dive into my french fries (what you ask? what happened to eating the protein first??). I took a drink of diet coke. I ate more fries. As i headed out onto the highway I opened up my sandwich and started eating merrily in my old ways. This joy of old habits lasted for about 10 minutes and then...whammo I started to have that stuck feeling. A voice inside my head said "Tina put down the sandwich NOW" I listened and did my best to relax and breathe. often i can sweat my way through these things and the food will pass and I can go back to my meal. haha yeah-no- not this time. I threw up the sandwich, did some sliming, threw up the fries and then some more fries. In all I threw up and slimed about 7 times on my drive home (I did discover and can barf and drive!!). Needless to say I no longer have any desire to eat (at least for tonight!) and I am vowing to break up with McDonalds! Just watching bunny's adventures with a carrot has put me off raw carrots. Needless to say my personal experience with a chicken sandwich has forever eradicated that desire from my future plans.

I have to say Im sad to see McDonald go....but he must. We are just not compatible anymore.

If anyone would like to join my break-up club please comment and post ideas for alternative 'fast food' that is healthy and edible!!

I THINK IT IS TIME FOR A FILL

Well the band has continued its fickle fickle ways. I am usually tighter in the morning and open at night. However, just when i think I am wide open and try to eat something decidedly naughty wham I find the band is still there. I am really afraid now that if I get another fill my slide back into poor habits will really and truly be over....I have started up with my diet coke and bread habits again......sooooo I am going to get a small fill (either this Monday or next as I cannot remember which day is my appointment).



so far-I am holding at 16 or so pounds lost (it goes up and down wildly but this week was PMS and period so I am holding off an official weight until next week)

Fickle Fickle Band

Ok so today I was back to restriction. I did not choose the best food to eat but boy oh boy I couldnt eat very much of it.

Breakfast-protein bar, Mocha frap. light.
Lunch-1/2 chicken whiskey river wrap from Red Robin, 8 or so french fries. I started eating the tortilla wrappy part but quickly decided that would be a bad idea and just ate the insides.

Dinner-the other 1/2 of the insides of the wrap then a while later 1/2 a wendy's hamburger, 1 french fry, and a small frosty.

wowow-i so would have had an eating fest with this before the band. In fact i would have had a burger at Red Robin and then another at Wendys, eaten all the fries and the frosty and been happy. I am thrilled that I was full soo fast.

I am going to wait out the next couple of weeks and then decide if I really need a fill of if this will be ok.

Tina

restriction has left the building or is it just fickle?

Im not sure if this band thing is working or not. I know i had restriction a few days ago but now im not sure if i have it or not.

Breakfast-1/2 3 cheese omlet, 2 pieces of multigrain toast
Lunch-1 can diet coke, 1 string cheese, 24 grapes
Dinner-3 triscuits, two fish filets, 1c mashed potatoes, 1 choc chip cookie
snack at night-1 bag 94% fat free microwave popcorn, 1 can diet coke.

I didnt drink enough water-
I had not one but 2 diet cokes (yep i miss it now and have done a face plant back into my d coke)
The lunch thing (must have been the bubbles in the diet coke) made me feel really full from 2 until 5pm but when i got home i was starving and nibbled on a couple of salt and vinegar potato chips and triscuitsiiiiii

I have cooked some carrots and plan on carrying them around so that i get more vegetables in (i was too hungry to wait tonight). I do know this band is putting a big hamper on my eating fast-there just isn't anything i should have that I can make fast. It kind of sucks. Im not a real lover of frozen dinners in the U.S. I have had great meals in the UK but of course we are crap over here. I think it is because everyone just eats out in the U.S. and it is more expensive to do so in the UK (as per my husbands conclusion)

Any way-another not so stellar day. I have lost a few of the pounds i gained on my rebound gain after I went back to solid foods. I hope the scale starts turning down again and gets me back to the 14 and more soon. I have 2 weeks and 2 days until i can get another fill.

Restriction but what is with my BAD fat habit!!

So I have started logging my food again (goodness knows how long I am going to manage it this time) and I have a problem with fat. I seem to like anything that exists on the planet with fat in it. However I fail to eat Fiber....so Tina loves the fat stuff and hates the veg. Yep that is about right. Even on my best days I seem to blow through the recommended fat allowances. I don't know how I am going to manage it but I'll let you know how this fatty problems progresses as I try to cut back.

Today thus far-two boiled eggs, 7 triscuits (lowfat), 3 string cheeses, grapes.

Houston I have restriction

So I stuck to mushies or at least what i perceived and sampled as easy food for me. Yes my husband the man in the chair was correct AFTER that post! I went out with them for dinner and had a stupid protein smoothie then nibbled at their infinitely more interesting and tasty Chinese food. It went down beautifully and I was fine (also worried that the fill was crap)

On Tuesday I had to drive down to my University for meetings and had a heck of a time with when, where and what to eat. I could not do my old McDonalds drive through meal in the car while driving routine so instead I had 2 eggs minus the cheese for breakfast, some grapes at noon, a protein bar in the middle of my long meeting (it got to 2:30 and i thought i was going to die of hunger). At 3 I was able to go to the microwave and do a steamer tv dinner (it was edible). then I drove home and had to go directly to a girlscout meeting. When it finished at 9pm i was hungry again so three of us went to a local bar with happy hour and I had a santa Fe salad minus corn. I was worried that i really didn't have enough restriction because I was able to eat 3/4 of it with no problem.

Soooo today-

I decided that I needed to have a good breakfast and I do love the toasted cheese sandwhich so I made on all brown and krispy. I ate half without a problem but about 1/2 way through the second 1/2 i thought i forgot to chew well enough ( I was distracted by rushing my dd into her clothes and shoes for school). So it felt like something was stuck but not horribly painful. It didnt really go away so I did what i did before the fill and tried a little drink (no no no didnt work anymore) I had what I now know is a PB two quick easy mini-barfs in the sink. two very small bites of cheese sandwich popped out and I was good to go.

I went to Starbucks for a wireless hookup at 9:30 (yea right no only a very costly one!). So i have a frappacino (I really need to learn how to spell the darned word!!). At 11:30 I was really hungry and had my tuna salad and 7 lowfat triscuits. I could not even finish the tuna!!!! I was fullll. So then nothing until after school at 3:30 I had my grapes from lunch. then an ice cream bar (supplied by my husband and one Oreo cookie.

Dinner was at 6pm and my older daughter made swedish meatballs, mashed potatoes, gravy and lingonberry jam (my new fav. meal) I had 5 meatballs, 1/2 c. potatoes, and two spoons of gravy plus 1 of jam. I'm full enough. Not interested in the chocolate chip cookies freshly baked in my kitchen!!!!

Ill go see what the caloric damage is (the ice cream was really ill advised) but baby steps!! I have more restriction that I have ever had in my life. I think it is much stronger during the day though. I will have to figure out if this is good enough or if I will need to suffer the days so I dont eat at night!!